Weaning from Breastfeeding, the End of an Era
My sweet Colton weaned right before Christmas at 17 months old💔. I breastfed for 36 months, 3 years in total. And 2 of those months I was both pregnant and nursing at the same time. I've been either pregnant or nursing since 2020. I am so proud of myself and my babies. I never used a pump, I never could leave more than 2-3 hours or overnight for 3 years total. My boys never drank from a bottle, and I never gave formula (nothing wrong with formula). Both of my breastfeeding journeys were different. Conner nursed 19 months (2 of those which I was pregnant with Colton) and he loved nursing, and Colton nursed 17 months and wasn't really an avid nurser like Conner was. I fought a significant oversupply both times, many clogged ducts, lots of hours spent nursing including nursing throughout the night for their first year of life (my babies don't sleep through the night until 1 year old). I lost 52 pounds in 19 months from breastfeeding alone after having Conner, and I lost 45 pounds in 17 months from breastfeeding alone after having Colton. Both times getting me under my pre pregnancy weights for each pregnancy. I am the healthiest I have been since 2012 thanks to my boys. I am so grateful 
. Breastfeeding is extremely healthy for mom and baby, just research the facts that are known. imagine all of the benefits we don't even know yet!
My experience with Conner
I had a wonderful experience breastfeeding Conner! After he was born I learned how to breastfeed him and my milk fully came in on day 3. I made it through those first 5 days after birth of intense soreness and pain from nursing and on day 6 it was bliss ever since. Conner nursed right away after birth and probably didn't miss an every 1.5 hour feed or more until he was 14 months old. Seriously. The kid loved to eat (he was always at an average weight). The only problem is my body apparently is an oversupplier, which him eating so enthusiastically and having such the small stomach that he did, I produced probably around 28oz a feed. (I got 6oz on each side AFTER feeding once because I was desperate for relief, and I STILL was engorged afterwards). It was bad. Bad bad. He couldn't eat that much at one time obviously and it took my body 6 weeks to realize it. Until then I had EXTREME engorgement, leaking, pain, and discomfort constantly. For some reason I could never get a pump to work. Milk would never come out and I worked with many lactation consultants. My only remedy during that time was to use ice to reduce inflammation and advil.
After the 6 week postpartum mark, my supply regulated mostly but I still produced insane amounts, just without the insane engorgement constantly. He nursed wonderfully until his 1st birthday when he was still nursing 5-7 times a day. He always preferred it over real food. I realized that was a slight problem so I quickly worked over those next 3 months to drop him to 1 feed a day. I also needed my period to come back to we could start trying for Colton immediately. When I breastfeed, I don't get my period. It's very strange. So right at the 13.5 month postpartum mark I got it back and we were able to start trying for Colton. I felt guilty for cutting Conner off so much but we were so set on giving him a sibling 2 years and school grades apart. We had a 3 month window to do that so we had to do that.
When Conner turned 16 months old, we got pregnant with Colton and my supply dropped significantly for the first time ever. With that, Conner slowly lost interest. From 16-19 months old, Conner nursed every other day or every 2 days. When Conner was a few days shy of 19 months old, I was 10 weeks pregnant with Colton and it was too much for my body. I had extreme nausea and was weak and tired so with the chaos of Christmas, I kind of just let it get in the way and he weaned. It was mutual but also bittersweet.
With Conner breastfeeding the amount that he did, I lost all of the pregnancy weight at 6.5 months postpartum but lost an additional 14.5 pounds after that by the 15 month postpartum mark. I lost a total of 52 pounds.
My experience with Colton
My experience breastfeeding Colton was honestly kind of rocky the whole time. It was honestly like a 17 month long fight. I'm surprised and blessed he truly made it that long. When Colton was born, he screamed from the moment he came out until about 4 months old. He nursed almost right away and latched better than Conner did in the beginning. (I still had that intense soreness and pain for the first 6 days but by day 7 I was golden). I knew I struggled with oversupply so I fed Colton every 3 hours on every other side. I had plenty of milk so he was doing great. I did this for the first 3 months. He never wanted to eat as often as Conner but starting at ~2 weeks old he spit up almost everything he ever ate. At around 5-7 months old he was underweight and has stayed either under weight or at the 1-3 percentile in weight ever since. He spit up/vomited nearly every hour until he was about 13 months old. With all of these factors and him not wanting to eat much, my supply regulated much easier and I wasn't as engorged. I just still made more than he needed. Colton slept 6 hours every night with only 1-3 wake ups to eat, it was amazing, he screamed 17 hours a day for those first 4 months and was so exhausted by the time bedtime rolled around he actually slept, unlike Conner. Naps didn't exist during the day (just like for Conner).
So when Colton turned 6 months old and I started him on solids, he immediately liked food waaaay better than nursing. A few days into him starting solids, he stopped nursing on my right side. It was so strange and very concerning. I still made plenty on my left side to supplement what he would need from the right, and just used the haaka "pump" on the right side so my supply didn't drop. I tried absolutely everything. It was so extremely stressful. I didn't know what was wrong. That lasted for about a month and a half. It's a miracle that it didn't affect my supply on that right side. Then things were smooth sailing (besides the constant vomiting) until about 10 months when he refused the right side again. That lasted only a month but it was just the same amount of fighting him. Jumping forward to 12 months old, Colton started another strike on my right side but this time I just let him win. It was past a year and I just didn't have the fight in me again. So I only nursed him on my left side for 5 months after that. So when he turned 1, he was nursing 5 times a day and I cut him down to 3 times a day after a few weeks, it was just too much. Once he got to 3 times a day he threatened to stop cold turkey. I struggle often with clogged ducts and did not want to risk mastitis or pain so I "forced" him to keep the 3 times unless he was really serious about it then I would've slowly had that happen and wean. Another battle. When Colton turned 15 months old he dropped to 1 feed a day on his own and stayed like that until he was a few days shy of 17 months. My goal was to get him through the Christmas holiday to protect his immune system, and to at least make it to as long as Conner did, almost 19 months. But my biggest goal was the 2 year mark and not a day over. I can't believe we didn't make those goals.
So when Colton was turning 17 months old, right before Christmas, he refused my left side, the only side he was eating from. And he quit cold turkey. I fought him to at least wean slowly to every other day or every 2 days to prevent discomfort for me (my oversupplying self) but he wasn't having it. It came out of the blue and shocked me. So for the following 2 weeks I used the haaka "pump" and got him to nurse here and there. Just enough to prevent clogged ducts for me. And that was it. It wasn't mutual like Conner's was, I was ready to go another 5 months but he said enough was enough and there was some peace and small bit of relief to that. No more fighting it. I love love love love breastfeeding but couldn't believe it was over forever. It was the one thing I was good at. Now what? At least I know I am physically able to leave Colton for more than 3 hours or overnight now if needed. Cody and I have our 10 year anniversary trip coming up and I thought we'd have to bring Colton.
Since Colton faced all of these issues and didn't nurse as much or the same amount as Conner, I lost the pregnancy weight at the 15 month postpartum mark and then reached 1 pound below that, 45 pounds total.
*Also when Colton was 9 months old I got RSV and was almost hospitalized. It was scary scary and lasted 17 days. I took decongestants every day and somehow my supply didn't drop even a little bit and somehow by the grace of God, Colton didn't get it. What a miracle and how incredibly stressful.*
How to wean:
Basically I used the method to wean gradually. I cut a feed every 2-4 weeks to avoid clogged ducts which I still got occasionally. Once I got down to one feed a day I nursed every other day for a month and then every 2 days for a month, then every 3 days for a month, and then let it naturally fizzle out from there with distractions. I'm serious, this was the best way for an oversupplier to wean. Be so so patient.
Handling Oversupply:
Basically I did the opposite of every supply supporting advice there was. I didn't hydrate well (not smart), I didn't eat enough or the right foods, rarely ever used the haaka and didn't pump, I only nursed every 3 hours and I block fed meaning I only fed from one side each feed. I didn't sleep well (not on purpose), and more. I basically looked up how to help supply and did the opposite. I think block feeding for those first 3 months really helped me the most. Colton didn't gain great weight because he spit up everything he ate. He still ate a large amount every 3 hours.
Handling Clogged Ducts:
I got these mainly in the beginning of breastfeeding, and then at the end of the journey during the weaning phase. When I would get a clogged duct, the key was to act fast and immediately. I would take advil to reduce inflammation, then warmth before nursing, then ice afterwards. The main thing that helped me was the haaka trick. Look that up online for the exact steps but basically it uses passive suction and warm water with dissolved epson salt to work at the "clog". I did that 3 times a day until the pain stopped. There should never be pain so when you feel that coming on, act fast to prevent further problems. Mastitis can occur from a clogged duct in as little as 12 hours or less.
I am heartbroken to know my breastfeeding journey is over and what this next step and chapter of motherhood and toddlerhood means for me and us. It's exciting and scary. I am grateful for my ability to nurse my babies for 3 years, and I am grateful my boys took to nursing as well as they did, even Colton. Thank you God for everything. Cheers to starting the next chapter!
With so much love,
Kayla Raborn
